Recently I pursued a possible online tutoring option through the Emerson House, a school in the UK.

As part of the exploration process my daughter participated in the school’s newly developed Maths and Dyscalculia Assessment. Following the online assessment, we received a written report summarizing the areas of math requiring further teaching, and also the recommendation that our daughter receive one-to-one instruction in math three times a week through the school’s online tutoring program.

We had to decide, do we continue teaching her math at home with dyscalculia-specific materials, or do we start this online tutoring with dyscalculia-trained tutors?

While the cost was reasonable and on-par with any tutoring options in the U.S., it would still be a significant portion of our monthly budget. The financial commitment was the first factor that made us pause to give this whole decision further consideration.

These are a few of the questions my husband and I considered before reaching a decision:

1. What would be gained by having a tutor or what were the positives? We thought about the benefits both for our daughter and for me (as her mom and math teacher).

2. Besides the cost, were there any losses to consider with tutoring? Anything we would miss or not have by choosing that direction?

3. Would tutoring make enough of a difference that it was worth the financial cost? What would we be willing to let go of in order to make it work financially? If we felt unsure the tutoring would be worth it, what did we specifically feel hesitant or unsure about?

4. How did our daughter think and feel about it? At thirteen years old, her intrinsic value for learning and dedication to her own education was important, whatever the choice.

The decision was complicated, and we went back and forth for a while. In the end, these are the things we finally decided on:

1. The main gain for tutoring was that it would be easier for me. I would no longer be responsible for the math class planning each day, it would free up time and energy. That would be nice!

2. One loss would be that tutoring would decrease my own learning and discovery about my daughter’s unique way of learning. I have been learning a great deal about her dyscalculia and how she thinks because of exploring math with her. Her struggles and also her “ah-ha!” moments are seen first-hand. This is valuable for making her feel known and understood, but also for my work as a dyscalculia advocate.

3. The most difficult question was whether the benefit of tutoring would be worth the financial cost. We honestly weren’t sure if she’d learn more effectively than she was learning now. It would mean letting go of significant pieces of our budget to make it happen, for something we weren’t sure would make a significant difference. For now, she could continue learning math at home, and we could keep the other budget items that were also supporting our family’s overall well-being.

4. Without telling our daughter about any of these considerations, I simply asked her what she thought about online math tutoring from the school? She thought about it for a while and said she was open to it. But then she said, “But I LIKE doing math class with YOU. Is there some way you could get some help from them so that you can keep teaching me?”

Her insight was helpful. It paired well with all the factors we were considering. In the end, we presented this idea to the school and they agreed! The plan was now that instead of regularly weekly tutoring for our daughter, the school would “tutor” and guide me for occasional sessions on how to teach her. This creative option feels like a win-win.

During our first meeting, Rob Jennings, Head of Maths at the Emerson House, was able to answer my list of questions, show me a helpful teaching method for multiplication, and help me make a plan for our math progress going forward. It was great.

I share our recent decision-making process with you just to show that these decisions are often complicated and not easy to make. Each family, student, and situation are unique. They require much thought and consideration. Also, life is constantly evolving, so we have to be continually flexing to choose the best option for that particular season. For example, there may be a time when tutoring makes the most sense for our situation.

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